8/15/2005
The significance of the number twelve

What's with the number two? It seems that, although I do not want to take the finals test for anything (except if I really have to), I always have to flirt with this particular digit.

Yes, I got a grade of 2.0 for Critical Thinking. I have to admit I thought the highest the block could get was a 2.5 (or even a 3.0), but Jaja and Toni both got a 4.0, and I don't understand why I'm sulking. It just seems that I'm not really used to people getting ahead of me (hence this thing). In fact, recently many people have been getting ahead of me (for example, the Yojimbo paper got me a 3.5 when almost all the people I was curious about got a 4.0), I can't help but think I'm losing the magic spark.

Well, I'm a really bad person, and you can just leave that to your imaginations to interpret everything else.

This is the last week of the term. We just bid farewell to Professor Pe (err, Miss Bam - due to technicalities I called her just that), our professor to that LPEP extension course (which is non-academic). Tomorrow, we will be bidding farewell to Professor Ronda and dance for PE - but not after me having to work with the food in a bid to recreate a little party. That's complete with us wearing semi-formal attires and dancing all three dances that we were taught. (At least there's still something to it.)

Tomorrow's PE class is the last time I'm going to act as PE president, so I better get it all right. Besides, since I cannot guarantee myself a 4.0 (I can't dance the way Jino does), this is the only way I can say to myself that this is going to be all right (considering my already dismal performance in Critical Thinking - at least by my standards).

If there's one thing that I can hear my classmates (and even my professors) say, it's not to put myself down. I remember Sister Pinky telling me just that last week. I remember a lot of my classmates tell me that - well, at least those who actually care. Just this past week I had a lot of people encourage me and all that - well, thanks, but sometimes I just don't get everything.

Despite all of these however, I can't help but think that someone is laughing at me behind my back. I don't know - it's just that when I was coordinating the food efforts for PE during Revelation class (because we can't watch the film we were supposed to watch) someone just kept on imitating everything I do. I know I've been acting weird a lot lately, but I can't help but wonder if it is purely about my actions, and it is simply an isolated case, or if the past has begun to catch up with me. (Please, don't let it be the second option.)

I think I know who they are. But I better not think about it, unless they tell me in the face - and I think they should. (I wonder if they're reading this right now. Do they think it's them I'm talking about?)

Anyway - before I do something that will ruin my day - I better stop typing and get home. I suddenly remembered Ira telling me this is the only site she's passed by recently. I also remembered how much I miss talking to her. Then again, I fear everyone else would think of something else. But hey - it's all about the friendships, right?

That was very thought provoking. My title didn't really make any sense, but - thought provoking is still the word.

And your responses...

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