5/05/2006
Silence in observation

Or, why we should be singing along to some song, preferably one sung in the 70s, whenever we're going back home. I don't know, that line just popped up my head when I was listening to Manila and, consequently, began thinking of those who virtually live most of their lives in the city because they just have to.

I did text Ariane last night, but she didn't reply - I guess it was a really fun eighteenth whatever, implying from Kizia's entry on it - until this morning. (Eighteenth year stress this early? I wonder what'll happen to me, but turning eighteen for women is an entirely different case than turning eighteen for men, much more when turning twenty.) Why, then?

"Tila nakaligtaan ko sa kawalan ang aking telepono eh..."

So, it's another Thursday night, and I'm making the most out of Internet at my grandmother's house. Rather than be affected at watching people like me - again, Pinoy Big Brother - admire people from afar and then pull out at the very last minute, I'm blogging and, ironically (again) talking to Katia about why I'm not watching today. Heck, I'm still hearing the television blare out Big Brother's instructions to guinea pigs exposed around the world, complete with the song that goes ang ganda ko, feel na feel ang long hair ko... luckily it isn't stuck in my head yet. Maybe when classes start.

I am losing things to say. Admittedly I couldn't observe that much - that would make me some kind of stalker - and nothing's really happening to me, but somehow writer's pressure comes to mind. I think Katia mentioned this before, me having to write novels soon (complete with the obligatory "pressure!" line), and indeed it's pretty hard writing for five straight days, like I used to back when classes were still on, without anything in mind, or everything being withheld.

Looks like I need some mental stimulation. My days are dragging ever-so-slowly. I passed up a chance at watching Mission Impossible 3 because I'm away from home. My mom texted me this morning, offering a movie ticket if I come home by myself, but writer's pressure (err, excessive blogging, I guess) strapped me of my funds. I couldn't even buy that Corinne Bailey Rae CD. And then Keane's next CD comes along in June, the reason why I've been trying my best to listen to Lipton Teamtime with RX recently, to hear their latest release Is It Any Wonder? And so far, I haven't, or I missed it.

And then I realize I've mentioned some of these things before, at least twice already during the vacation.

Then again, I'll be at school on the twenty-second and will be regretting everything I've said here, with majors application, hectic schedules and stuff. Maybe that's what college students are supposed to feel, unless they've got something substantial to fill in their term breaks, like volleyball in Boracay? Or court hearings? Or a going-steady relationship?

"Maybe I, I'd go job searching again."

Or look for a summer job?

Before Katia blasts me again with thoughts through lines that go along the lines of the idea of loving is the willingness to take chances - wasn't that the attachment? - I'll hit upload and the world will see that I'm still here, ending up thinking of things that I somehow have begun to refuse thinking again. I guess you know where this supposedly goes next.

And your responses...

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