5/31/2009
Distance changes everything

You're better off striking on your own. Don't regret severing those ties. Besides, they can do it so easily. That, or you continue to be pummeled by what you think is them being concerned, when they're actually just annoyed that you're hanging on to them. Face it. They no longer want you around, and there's nothing you can't do about it. It just happened, and you look like a relic, easily forgotten. There goes the road.

It may be regrettable to abandon everything that's been built in whatever time period it may be. However, sometimes you have no other choice but to do just that. We're the sentimental folks, and we need the security blanket, and it hurts seeing someone else curl up when you shiver. Or seeing it no longer fits you. Whatever it is you're thinking, it's always at odds with whatever they're thinking, and almost always, it's you on the losing end, being rejected for who you are, or what you think, or just plain, well, stupidity. Randomness. "You are the weakest link. Goodbye!"

After all these years, you'll just never meet halfway anymore. You might think you do, but as time passes by it becomes clearer that the bond has just disappeared. Who insisted that you can keep up anyway, with all that new-fangled technology that involves buzzes and emoticons? Sincerity can be easily thrown out of the window, whichever window this may be. It's a misunderstanding that's looking for something to wreck. You think their ideas are ridiculous. They think you're being irrational. You think they're pushing you against the wall, severely restricting you. While you want to be left alone, you don't want to be left alone. Another case of word play. Another case of being complicated.

The thing is, we all tend to forget. One slips from the mind, as others make their way in. Priorities, they call it. The next thing you know, when you try to get back, you'll be greeted by this weird sense of euphoria that makes you feel left out anyway. Surrounded by strangers, perhaps. The only thing you can do is say, "oh, hello, cloud."

But sure, you are still close friends. Then again, "close", in this case, is totally subjective. We've seen people act close to people they've just met. We've seen people talk to people hundreds of miles away, as if they were never really far away. And being "close" is just a matter of word use. Physical proximity is, almost always, a compromise that doesn't work well for everyone. Emotional proximity could mean both ways. All you need, after all, is proof that things are still the same as they are, or, at the very least, you can keep it that way.

But the bottom line is, you no longer know who you're talking to. It's a totally different thing from, say, the times when you did everything together. You had a grasp of everything, and you knew when to step the line, which is almost always never. Well, you've kept in touch, but catching up isn't going to get you back to how things were. And if you're the sentimental kind, this should prove disastrous.

Distance changes everything.

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