2/07/2010
Robert Pattinson everything

If I can sum up my life in a keyword, it would be this: non-existent.

Of course, that means nobody would be able to find me. Does anyone actually type in "non-existent" on Google? If it was non-existent in the first place then nobody would waste their time searching for it, unless said person has this strong feeling in the gut that it's somewhere.

Some people do have that strong feeling in the gut, but others just rely with what they see.

And no, this is not one of those blog entries where I complain about being out of everybody's radars.

I had a different thought, actually. This one came months ago, when I was browsing through magazines during lunch break. There's a shelf for the men's magazines, laddish or otherwise. There's one for fashion, one for celebrities, one for the geeks and one for the decent titles you can't exactly give a whole category to, like arts or travel. And there's one, of course, for the young girls that publishers - and really, anyone who writes for a living - see as a very critical demographic to impress.

I actually feel bad that "teenagers" to these people are just little girls who are concerned with bubblegum pop, some fashion and their crushes. I was sixteen for a year, guys, but I'm expected to live through reading nothing that is relevant to me. Oh, wait, that's FHM.

Anyway, you do notice all these magazines for teen females, right? Total Girl probably only has four girls rotating as cover subjects: Miley Cyrus, Demi Lovato, Selena Gomez and Miranda Cosgrove. (I'm sure Ellie, being one of these so-called tweens, can shed light on this matter.) The subjects inside are presumably - probably, thankfully - a bit more varied, although I'm sure they're either Zac Efron, Justin Bieber, Taylor Lautner or, of course, Robert Pattinson.

Now, I sort of get it. I even write about the Twilight films for work, although we have really toned down on that over the past few months, and for a good reason: as one of my Seattle colleagues put it, anything that comes out of that front is four-fifths fake, and the rest, just a repeat of everything else. Really, everything has to have Robert's name just to draw attention. "He's kissing Kristen!" "He's kissing Kristen again!" "He's got Kristen pregnant!" (They really reported that last bit, all because there's a photo of her on the set of The Runaways with her belly showing, never mind that it's really meant to be that way.) Same goes with the magazines I browse through. There's always his face over there. There are books dedicated to regurgitating everything rabid fans - the same ones that almost got him killed on the set of Remember Me - already know. They all have his face over there. "It will sell!" some publisher might say in some board room. "Girls love Robert Pattinson." Months later, I see those commemorative Twilight magazines, sold at a 25% discount.

My point is, everybody relies on what they see. "I like that," they'll go. It's ingrained. "I like that just because I like that. If everybody likes it, it must be good, right?" So, people try to get other people's attention by adapting to popular tastes. A synth riff here becomes a Cobra Starship rip-off, and heavens know who that band ripped off. Same way everyone wants to be Robert Pattinson just to attract attention, the same way webmasters draw page views when someone searches for "Robert Pattinson photos", never mind that there's nothing new for fans, or anybody else for that matter, to see.

Those who try to make their own way, well, disappear into obscurity, eventually forced to take on the "non-existent" description, making them more doomed because nobody searches for "non-existent" on Google. I'm not saying I tend to go rogue in everything, but consciously being like other people just to gain their attention is not my thing. There's a reason why I wasn't blessed with a nerd-like knowledge of the American version of The Office.

Then again, I did do many things for exactly those reasons. Publicized it, even. Heavily. Didn't really change anything.

And your responses...

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