He stood there, in the middle of chaos, quite confident that he's doing the right thing. He's engrossed, giving out instructions to those on the ground, walking around occasionally, keeping himself busy, keeping himself satisfied. He was in a daze, a positive kind of daze, and his head was - pardon the cheesy reference - in it.
But, from out of the blue, some guy approaches him and decides to nudge his legs. Specifically, that area behind the knee, whatever that's called. One moment, he stood confidently; the next, he was feeling weak, losing composure, losing balance, almost falling down. Obviously, he didn't like it.
"Ano ka ba?"
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3/30/2009
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3/28/2009
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"Maybe you're imagining things," Asia said. She loved insisting it.
It's funny how much a week can change, or how much changes in a week. My only sense of security got shattered. The office bitches have stopped being subtle, deciding instead to go one step shy of outright high school bullying. Things have not gone the way they're supposed to be. Maybe I am imagining, that this is another cosmic conspiracy to kick me out of existence, but I'd rather think everything is becoming as mindless and mundane as an idiot. Absolutely no consideration for me.
And so, this world deserves my middle finger. Six billion people in the world, and then there's me. And yes, you'll all say that I'm luckier, that perhaps half of the population are facing death by hunger, or disease, or oppression, or race, or mindlessness, but you do not have the right to contest what I'm saying. That's tantamount to not listening, to not caring, and that's not what justice is supposed to mean in the first place. (What justice is there to talk about when the offended are being blamed for causing the offenders to exist in the first place?) I don't want any more of that.
Read more »
It's funny how much a week can change, or how much changes in a week. My only sense of security got shattered. The office bitches have stopped being subtle, deciding instead to go one step shy of outright high school bullying. Things have not gone the way they're supposed to be. Maybe I am imagining, that this is another cosmic conspiracy to kick me out of existence, but I'd rather think everything is becoming as mindless and mundane as an idiot. Absolutely no consideration for me.
And so, this world deserves my middle finger. Six billion people in the world, and then there's me. And yes, you'll all say that I'm luckier, that perhaps half of the population are facing death by hunger, or disease, or oppression, or race, or mindlessness, but you do not have the right to contest what I'm saying. That's tantamount to not listening, to not caring, and that's not what justice is supposed to mean in the first place. (What justice is there to talk about when the offended are being blamed for causing the offenders to exist in the first place?) I don't want any more of that.
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3/25/2009
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There are people who are misunderstood. There are people who refuse to be understood. There are people who people don't want to understand.
There are people who are considered weird, and there are people who are simply tagged weird.
There are many things we'll never wrap our fingers around with.
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There are people who are considered weird, and there are people who are simply tagged weird.
There are many things we'll never wrap our fingers around with.
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3/21/2009
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"Seven Harry Potter books daw ang bigat?" I asked, after placing my signature on the second column.
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3/14/2009
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In a world where effort is mandatory, it's weird seeing people give a lot of emphasis to those who never have to try. Now, this guy, he came from a rich family. She possesses indescribable beauty. He has a smile that brings everyone to their knees. She is the person you'd want to be around with. He makes for the perfect husband. And then there's us, the hopeless people who want to be just like them.
So, perhaps because that's what we're told to prize, or at worst endure without choice, we try to achieve what they have achieved. There's a reason why cosmetic surgeons and facial care manufacturers make a lot of money. There's a reason why billboards along highways insist bad grammar gets in the way of a kiss. There's a reason why I'm paying a dermatologist, and why I'm occasionally buying style magazines with the guise of good journalism when all that matters is what I should do best. There are the talking points, and then there's looking good. Both are utterly indispensable.
And then, there are the people that don't have to try. They'll just throw them inside a house with 24/7 cameras, perhaps make a million hearts swoon, and make you a star regardless of whether you won anything, or wanted you around with your partner in the first place. Or, they'll have you wear a bikini and pose for the cameras; besides, you did not have breast augmentation surgery, didn't you? You didn't have all your zits popped out. You didn't have all your unweildly fat sucked out of your body. You just happen to have a certain charisma, a certain charm, which attracted people to you, for better or for worse. Perhaps the ability to crack jokes, make fun of anything and everything, make sense, or maybe not. Touch people. Change them for the worst. As for us, well, we know the right steps and yet we can only try harder.
Read more »
So, perhaps because that's what we're told to prize, or at worst endure without choice, we try to achieve what they have achieved. There's a reason why cosmetic surgeons and facial care manufacturers make a lot of money. There's a reason why billboards along highways insist bad grammar gets in the way of a kiss. There's a reason why I'm paying a dermatologist, and why I'm occasionally buying style magazines with the guise of good journalism when all that matters is what I should do best. There are the talking points, and then there's looking good. Both are utterly indispensable.
And then, there are the people that don't have to try. They'll just throw them inside a house with 24/7 cameras, perhaps make a million hearts swoon, and make you a star regardless of whether you won anything, or wanted you around with your partner in the first place. Or, they'll have you wear a bikini and pose for the cameras; besides, you did not have breast augmentation surgery, didn't you? You didn't have all your zits popped out. You didn't have all your unweildly fat sucked out of your body. You just happen to have a certain charisma, a certain charm, which attracted people to you, for better or for worse. Perhaps the ability to crack jokes, make fun of anything and everything, make sense, or maybe not. Touch people. Change them for the worst. As for us, well, we know the right steps and yet we can only try harder.
Read more »
3/12/2009
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I've been here for four days and I haven't had an idea of what to write. Blame four days of the forced wear-off. I'll try saying something substantial.
Ariane got a phone call from one of the radio stations she went to, asking her to make a guest appearance on one of their shows. Many of us told her about it, and she didn't expect to actually make it that far, so never mind the late time, and never mind the distance - she still did it. One night became two nights, and both nights I fell asleep while waiting for her to pop up, because I'm no longer used to staying up late. And then she tells me the gig wasn't her kind of thing, and promptly backed out.
Jackie asked me about nouns that start with the letter A, and by then I quickly realized that creating questions for quiz shows are harder than it looks. It took me almost half an hour before I submitted "Abba" and "ashtray", and it does feel good to realize that she's made something out of it, and only hopes for it to be approved before it gets asked to a partly-hapless population, complete with gyrating dancers and slightly-risque humor.
Read more »
Ariane got a phone call from one of the radio stations she went to, asking her to make a guest appearance on one of their shows. Many of us told her about it, and she didn't expect to actually make it that far, so never mind the late time, and never mind the distance - she still did it. One night became two nights, and both nights I fell asleep while waiting for her to pop up, because I'm no longer used to staying up late. And then she tells me the gig wasn't her kind of thing, and promptly backed out.
Jackie asked me about nouns that start with the letter A, and by then I quickly realized that creating questions for quiz shows are harder than it looks. It took me almost half an hour before I submitted "Abba" and "ashtray", and it does feel good to realize that she's made something out of it, and only hopes for it to be approved before it gets asked to a partly-hapless population, complete with gyrating dancers and slightly-risque humor.
Read more »
3/06/2009
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The idea was to let go, but that was an understatement. It appears as if you had a daunting task in front of you. You weren't just to let go - or, better yet, you cannot let go until you address some issues. There's trust. There's confidence. There's actually making things work, making sure they don't get affected by whatever it is happening outside, or within you. You had to look the part before you can do it.
Well, it should be easy, then. Just keep quiet and keep to yourself, shouting out everything that you feel in obscure metaphors and complicated subject lines.
It did not work.
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Well, it should be easy, then. Just keep quiet and keep to yourself, shouting out everything that you feel in obscure metaphors and complicated subject lines.
It did not work.
Read more »
3/02/2009
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And then, after eight months, I've gotten tired of my friends complaining the same complaints, about me complaining the same complaints. It's because I'm not doing anything about it. It's because I never stood up for myself. It's because I never assert my needs. It's because I prefer to focus on what I'm doing rather than be distracted by idle conversation. It's because I don't ask anyone for anything. It's because I act so awkward.
So, they say, I should just zip my mouth and live with the crap I get here. Because, they say, I'll get out of here soon. And then they'll say I haven't been looking for a replacement hard enough.
Funny they say that.
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So, they say, I should just zip my mouth and live with the crap I get here. Because, they say, I'll get out of here soon. And then they'll say I haven't been looking for a replacement hard enough.
Funny they say that.
Read more »
Niko Batallones writes The Upper Blog.
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