"Hindi talaga kayo nagsi-sticker ever since, ano?" the barista asked me.
"Hindi," I answered, although I know it isn't true. I did do the whole Starbucks sticker thing, twice, at least twice. I did it with the Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf at least twice. And then I realized I didn't really get to use those planners as much, so I stopped... only to get a Moleskine planner once, and a Mark's planner (the ones co-branded with Monocle, of course) twice.
And then I shifted to Muji planners, and even then I didn't get around to using them... but to be fair, it was 2020, and there was nothing to write in your planners. If I'm being honest, the only time I really picked up the habit was this year. All my meetings with industry titans, all my appointments with doctors and therapists, all my editorial deadlines, and all - well, not all, but a lot of my rawest thoughts, for when I found myself needing to write but not having anything else to write on. Sometimes, you see it - take my essay last week from Hong Kong - but most of the time, you don't, as if that matters.
These planners - well, the ones you buy directly, because getting them through twelve expensive coffee-based drinks is pretty expensive, come to think of it - always start not with January of the new year, but with December of the last one. I suppose it makes sense. You get them before the year starts, and if you're itching to get going, you can get going sooner. But that makes for one month you leave behind. There are thirteen months in a planner, but you only really write in twelve of them, unless you forget, or, more like, you're not like me.
I already got my planners for 2024. Muji again, of course, because I had such a good rhythm with the one I currently have. That, and they had a discount code, which meant I didn't think twice about getting my planner... a couple of months ago? I just kept it in my drawer, waiting for the day to be brought out.
That day is today.
I mean, it is the end of November, and tomorrow is a new month, and a new year. I figured I can't just set this notebook that spent a year with me without paying tribute so... thank you, I guess, to this planner that helped me maintain the illusion that my life is going well despite, you know, all that. Writing things down like "lunch with Claud" or "Camille's birthday thing" or "This would never happen if we were still together. And she is the fan." - you know, at least I can maintain the illusion that people do care for me, despite whatever.
But that day is not today.
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